Originally posted on LinkedIn on March 26, 2024
The concept of submission is deeply countercultural. We do not wake up in the morning thinking “How shall I submit today?” But perhaps we should. Submission is not subjugation (which is forced) or subordination (placement within a hierarchy). Submission occurs where agency encounters humility. It is understanding that the world would be a much worse place if you were the beginning and end of all things, and that accepting the authority of something greater surrenders responsibility to that authority. The question is, how do you know what authority is deserving of your surrender?
Heartwarmingly, I hear more talk of service every year. We talk about service as “giving back”, indicating gratitude. This feels appropriate, but seems incomplete. It suggests that we serve in response to an inequality that is the byproduct of life’s unfair allocations. But here is another possibility: we serve because people are worthy of dignity. In this way, all can serve, not just those who “have”, because all can recognize the dignity of others. It has nothing to do with what I have, and everything to do with who I am, in seeing who you are. Because all can serve, all are capable of doing great things.
Selflessness might seem to contradict the libertarian/efficient market lens through which I tend to view the world, but it does not. I do not believe in free markets because they maximize profit. I believe in free markets because they maximize human flourishing through enablement of choice. Yes, markets are imperfect (topic for another day). Regardless, I believe in individual agency over one’s time and effort. I also believe we were designed (created) to be selfless, that we find our fulfilment in confronting suffering through helping others (for persistent readers, I explore this aspect in The Status Paradox, linked in comments).
Sacrifice brings together the ideas above, but adds something more. To sacrifice is to selflessly submit in the service of others, in a way that one experiences deep and grievous loss. This grave cost is why we speak of fallen soldiers as giving the ultimate sacrifice. To have a spirit of sacrifice is to understand that what you have is not your own, but only lent to you for a moment, for a greater purpose. That purpose is specified by the authority to which you submit. It is given in service of the dignity of others. It requires the setting aside of self, an exercise of free will, without which sacrifice would not attain the nobility which we ascribe to it.
I am not sure I have the courage to raise sons who fully embrace these ideas. But who on earth could?
J
P.S. If you chanced on this post because of the title, and are feeling overwhelmed, know that you are important, and loved, and that tomorrow is a new day. In the U.S., call 988 or 1-844-472-9687.